Your brother is doing it. All of your friends are doing it. Your girlfriend is doing it during your Skype dates. Your professor does it while he checks attendance. Your psychotic ex who still tweets about you is doing it. So what is it?
Fantasy football. Still lost? Well, that’s what this guide is for. So seriously, what is it?
“Isn’t it just like people in T-shirts who run in the grass and tackle each other like crazy?” asks freshman marine science and biology major Janae Sweet.
Sadly no, that isn’t the reality of fantasy. ESPN fantasy analyst (yeah, it’s a real job), Matthew Berry defines fantasy football as “The closest thing to owning a franchise. By playing fantasy football, you can become the owner, the general manger, and the coach of your team.”
The most confusing thing about fantasy football is that it isn’t a football fantasy.
You aren’t playing the role of a football player, but instead you are playing the role of a football franchise owner.
As owner, you decide your team name, logo, and even a team fight song if you really feel like it. So once that’s done you can start, right? Wrong.
In order to play fantasy football, you need to register your team in a league.
These are generally free but prize money leagues exist and yield high profit if won.
But considering this is a beginner’s guide, let’s just keep it basic for now. The number one mistake that owners at this stage make is choosing a league that they do not understand.
You’re going to see things that will require an Advil after reading. Abbreviations like PPR (points per reception) and IDP’s (Independent Defensive Players) can change the whole dynamic of a league.
A league that features head coaches as a position may look fun, but if you don’t know their relevance or importance, then you’ll be lost.
Find a solid league, do some research on the settings that you don’t know and join.
So you have a team and a league, now you just need some players. Players are generally selected in a backyard style draft.
The best way to understand a fantasy football draft is to go out to Pepin Stadium and imagine every player in the NFL sitting in the stands.
Hundreds of athletes just waiting to be selected by you and the other owners. In a random order, the owners will select players to fill out their roster.
Standard rosters include a quarterback, two running backs, two wide receivers, a tight end, a kicker, a team defense, a utility (AKA Flex) position, and bench spots.
There is little structure in what order you can make picks. Nothing dictates that you have to select a quarterback first, and there is no rule that you have to fill out your roster before choosing bench spots.
So everything is squared away as far as your team is concerned, and you are ready to start winning some matchups. So how do you win a fantasy football matchup?
“You just compare stats and out-football the other guy,” said junior communications major Gabriel Disselkoen.
For the most part, yes, your players just have to put up better stats than your opponents, and you will win. Players receive points for whatever stats they produce each week.
Despite the confusing jargon, the scoring is actually simple. Receiving and rushing players are rewarded one point for every ten yards collected, and given six points for every touchdown.
For example, if Marshawn Lynch gets 138 total yards and two touchdowns, then he will score 25 points for your team. Those points will be added to your weekly total, and whoever has the higher total at the end of the week will win the matchup.
However, obeying this guide does not guarantee a title in your league this year. These are just the basics. There is much more to learn to become a fantasy football junkie.
The season has already started, but there is still time to join in the fun. Make rivalries, win games, and just be active and this season will be fantastic for you.
Marcus Mitchell can be reached at marcus.mitchell@spartans.ut.edu