I live for Girl Scout Cookie season. Crumbled up Thin Mints over vanilla ice cream? Heaven. I can polish off a box of Samoas faster than you can believe (although I’m not proud of it). What can I say, they’re probably the most delicious cookies known to man. I can’t stop myself.
Plus, I can feel good knowing that my money supports an organization I used to be a part of, whose mission is to “build girls of courage, confidence, and character, who make the world a better place,” according to the Girl Scouts of the USA website. I can’t see the downside to that.
However, Pastor Kevin Swanson, host of His Generations Radio, is more skeptical. On his radio show the week of Oct. 24, Swanson attacked Girl Scouts, calling them “wicked,” insisting that their “vision of America is antithetical to a biblical vision of womanhood.”
He urged listeners to boycott their delicious cookies, claiming that by purchasing a box of Thin Mints, you’re supporting lesbianism, Planned Parenthood and abortion, reports Yahoo! News.
For someone who believes that “feminism has been devastating this country,” (NY Daily News), I can see why Pastor Swanson might be a little upset with an organization that fosters girls to become confident and build character.
Becoming confident as a woman is a big part of feminism, after all. According to his beliefs, Girl Scouts are taking young girls and turning them into lesbian communists. Swanson said during his show that he “didn’t realize there were this many lesbians leading this country, but they certainly show up in Girl Scout conventions across America… In fact, if you want a communist in the White House in the year 2020 you have to get more daughters raised with the worldview, the independent mindset, the worldview that is presented by the Girl Scouts of America,” says huffingtonpost.com.
The only thing Swanson is technically correct about is that purchasing Girl Scout Cookies really does help fund the Girl Scouts of America’s programs. The rest of the misguided, wrong and downright ridiculous information Swanson is using to base his claims is laughable.
First and foremost, the Girl Scouts of America and Planned Parenthood are not affiliated in any way. In February 2012, after Indiana Rep. Bob Morris made similar accusations against the Girl Scouts for being used as a “tactical arm” by Planned Parenthood, the president and CEO of Planned Parenthood’s Indiana branch, Betty Cockrum, spoke up.
NY Daily News reports that Cockrum explained Planned Parenthood does not have any formal partnership with the Girl Scouts, although they do recognize the contributions that Girl Scouts continue to make to society. The two organizations have about as much to do with each other as Girl Scout cookies and Communism, which is also nothing.
Speaking of Communism, some of the most notable Conservative First Ladies have served as honorary leaders of Girl Scouts of America, including Nancy Reagan, Barbara Bush and Laura Bush, according to Yahoo! News. These women don’t strike me as the kind to push a Communist agenda on the young girls of America, nor do I believe that they are lesbians, considering all of them are married to men.
My favorite detail, and the most hilarious part of Pastor Kevin Swanson’s tirade against buying Girl Scout Cookies, might be what he suggested be done if purchasing the cookies is unavoidable. Swanson insisted that, if you can’t resist the urge to buy a box of delicious Girl Scout Cookies (and who can?), at least “take a big black magic marker and cross out every reference to Girl Scouts of America on all the signs and all the boxes, because we don’t wanna promote that organization,” reports jezebel.com. Crossing out the name of the organization is just as effective of a boycotting strategy as crossing out the nutrition facts is as a way to cut calories.
Kevin Swanson’s anti-Girl Scouts campaign is about as ridiculous as it is effective, and I don’t think the Girl Scouts of America have to worry about it bankrupting their programs any time soon. If anything, Swanson’s message will ensure more cookies for the decent human beings who see the importance of teaching girls courage, confidence and character, and young girls have the potential to make a difference in the world.
Samantha Bloom can be reached at samantha.bloom@spartans.ut.edu