I remember in high school when a guy asked me out on a date for the first time. When I say date, I mean it was an actual date where we went to the movies, watched Step Brothers (yes, we actually watched the movie), and then he drove me home and walked me to my door. Another date we went on consisted of mini golf and cyclone ice cream from Friendly’s. Other times included going to the town’s annual firemen’s carnival, hopping on rides and pigging out on fried oreos. Those moments gave us the chance to find out our likes and dislikes without the awkward silences. He saw my competitive side while I saw the little boy inside of him scream like a girl as we rode the Zipper, flipping upside down.
Dating was the norm in high school. Then, I graduated and came to UT. I quickly learned I’d be considered lucky if the guy bought me breakfast the morning after. And that’s if I even stayed the night or vice versa.
Some say it’s a college thing, but dating is nonexistent. The word “date” isn’t even in our vocabulary; it’s “hanging out” or “chillin.” Why is that? Well, for one, our generation is afraid of rejection and coming off too strongly. Nobody wants to be the one who feels too much or be the stage-five clinger.
Yet, you still can’t help but over-analyze the situation because you are in the unknown. Are we just friends? Something more? Should I shave my legs?Does he even like me?
It’s a down whirl spiral damning relationships. We are all out of sync, so we try to play it safe with the late-night bar hook-ups and the dreaded late-night booty calls. No commitment. No emotions. Just casual sex. It’s a win-win situation, right?
Freshman marine biology major Ravenn Wright thinks otherwise. “Our generation is so lazy,” Ravenn said. “No one wants to go out there and meet people or get to know them.”
Some say it’s a college thing. “They want to live in the moment and if they get bored, they move along,” said senior elementary education major RJ Forsythe.
After five years at UT, Forsythe is at the point in his life now where he’s looking for something more. “I’m not into the whole hooking up and never speaking again.” Although, Forsythe has admitted to taking part in it every now and then. “Bar hook ups. I mean, oh boy, they are interesting; bars are interesting. Of course it happens.” And so do booty calls. “Everyone has them; everyone has had them. I would be lying if I said I didn’t have them over the years that I’ve been at school.”
And thanks to technology, especially the new app Tinder, you don’t even have to go to dollar beers or happy hour to hook up with someone! For those who don’t know what Tinder is, it’s a dating app that lets you know who is in your area of location. You can swipe left if you are not interested and right if you are. If the other person swipes right for you too, then it lets you talk to each other through the app and you can plan to meet up. It’s like Match.com but for casual sex.
Not everyone uses it that way though. “Tinder is a place for me to talk/flirt with strangers generally,” said Tasha Spetalnick, a junior psychology major. “Although, sometimes I’ll get a match with someone I do know, but that leads to [only] texting.” Since she started using the app, Tasha has met two people from Tinder. “Both were only one time things.”
Still, the fact that our generation has to hide behind a screen to meet and talk to people is a bit concerning. What does that say about us? Are we indeed just lazy? Or are we just scared? Does it matter? Maybe yes. Maybe no. Times are changing. It may not always be this way. Back in the day our parents courted each other, so maybe in 30 years, this phase will fade out and the younger generations will have found a new way to find love.