A lot has been made of Lady Gaga’s, let’s say, androgynous appearance at the MTV Video Music Awards, where she performed “Yoü and I” looking like Jerry Lee Lewis, if Jerry Lee Lewis had a Roman nose.
(Side note: Gaga calls her alter ego “Jo Calderone,” but I shall hereafter refer to Gaga’s boyish alter-ego as “Man O’Gaga,” for no reason other than it amuses me.) Interviews from image consultants (who are apparently starving for attention) began showing up all over the Internet, making the case that Man O’Gaga had irreparably damaged her (his?) image and only succeeded in alienating portions of her (his?) audience. That gender-bending is still considered taboo surprised me somewhat, since I reacted with a yawn that almost broke my TMJ-ridden jaw.
But, I get it. Lady Gaga is trying to challenge the idea that sexual expressiveness is unbecoming. And she’s doing it by trying to become downright filthy. She’s not there yet.
The idea that sexuality is filthy reflects centuries-old societal oppression toward the act of sex itself, running the gamut from heterosexuals to gays, lesbians and transgendered alike. “Filth” reflects this. I’m of the firm belief that liberating the “most filthy” among us (which, again, the kind of filth I’m talking about is a reflection of societal injustice) ultimately liberates everyone. Therefore, Gaga, why won’t you be filthy?
I’m going to be honest. I like filth. Filth excites me. It’s the same thrill I got as a pre-teen sneaking Playboys under my bed. It’s why I listen to the Sex Pistols nearly every day. So, naturally, one like me must be on a constant pilgrimage toward filth.
I’ve been following Lady Gaga since stumbling upon her first album, The Fame, three years ago. And, though I despise most pop stars, Gaga attracted me because I heard in her the potential to be the most stimulating, filthiest pop star ever unleashed on an unsuspecting public.
I heard this despite the fairly bubblegum sound of The Fame. A few snippets of lyrics made Gaga’s desire to be dirty obvious. Lines like “I wanna take a ride on your disco stick” and “I’m bluffin’ with my muffin’” made my hunch blatantly obvious.
Ask my girlfriend; back then I told her, “Lady Gaga needs to become really dark. She should start hanging out with Marilyn Manson.” Manson since appeared on a remix of “Lovegame,” but I hoped that Gaga would marry Manson and turn him into some perverse echo of Yoko Ono, dictating filth to Gaga in-studio to the annoyance of everyone. Perhaps I am too demanding.
To be clear, this is not about selling sex. It’s about selling filth. There’s a difference. Man O’Gagas of the world unite!
Now, with Gaga’s second studio album, Born This Way, firmly imprinted on my psyche, I’d like to report that Gaga is getting closer to her gutter potential, but she’s not quite there. We’ll start with Born This Way’s dirtiest lyric, “I want your whiskey mouth all over my blonde south” from the song “Heavy Metal Lover.”
Gaga, if I had any say, your next album would be called Blonde South. My vision: It will be borderline pornography and won’t be sold at Walmart or Target, or any respectable record store for that matter. Trust me, Gaga, you don’t need them.
Gaga, I hear exactly where your sound needs to go. Like taking the Spanish-tinged romp “Americano” to its logical sonic conclusion: Imagine Nine Inch Nails meets an Enrique Iglesias stuck in the depths of a cocaine binge and existential crisis. That’s what I want to hear.
And, Gaga, I think you want to hear it too. Someone needs to drag you in this direction.
Why not me? Gaga, if you happen to read this (you must have someone employed to find things written about you, yes?), I have a proposition.
Allow me to be your manager. Or at least an advisor. Together, we’ll dive further into the depths of depravity than any dirty-minded pop star ever has, or ever will. You won’t regret it.
Michael Rumore can be reached at mrumore@spartans.ut.edu.
In scandinavia people think jews have a very strange face, especially the nose is very bad-looking,kinda scythe-like they say, . They call it ” Ful nasa”. the word “ful” is pronounced like the english word “fuel”. i kind of feel sorry for them, but maybe its the testosterone.. i´ve heard it increases the tissues inside the nose, especially bone mass.
It´s intresting to note that the hebrew work “nasa” can mean both “to marry” and “to lift” and “to desire” among many other verbs..
Your article might be interesting if you weren’t so incredibly off about your assumptions. Gaga created the role of Jo to show her diversity as an actress. You are so off it’s embarrassing. I suppose some people feel the need to fabricate information to get attention. While others can just be authentic entertainers who give a damn about making a positive difference in the world. What have you done to make the world a better place? How much of your time and income goes to rebuild Haiti and Japan, or bring attention to equal-rights offenses… or anything for that matter? Just curious how the self-righteous think. Please, enlighten me.
MMM probably not. I am from the south, and there is nothing proper about it. I was just exercising my rights-as were they. I’ll leave ’em alone. Just bored. lol
Or LOL could be a genuinely interested reader with no agenda other than enjoying an article about a pop star. Anyway, Just saying, if you don’t care about The Minaret then stop complaining about it. Offer constructive criticism. Join the paper and make it better. Or, pretend like you don’t even notice–as we say in the south, it’s called being proper.
Actually, I never even commented on Lady Gaga. It just so happens that the conversation ended up on here. It’s cool
yikes, someone really gets defensive about their lady gaga comments… sorry, wow
Obviously LOL and his/her friend either work for the Minaret or are Minaret groupies. My point was, the Minaret blows. I was also commenting on Monster’s post. Notice I did not say that they did not research this story. Monster made a statement IMPLYING that they did not do the research, so I was only informing him that they rarely do and still print it.
If this did not do enough to explain an obvious attempt to help out a fellow reader, let me be a little more elaborate. When I said “They always print trash they didn’t really bother to research”, I included both those articles that need research and those that do not. I did not directly reference this particular article, but only made a statement as a generalization of the type of article that the Minaret continues to let pass.
I hope this clears up any confusion that my comment may have caused. Because I do not believe my opinion really matters, I did not think anyone would really care what I had to say. You have shown me that I am, in fact, relevant as a commenter and therefore I will be sure to be completely clear with my intentions in my comments from now on. Thank you LOL and your cling-on agree with LOL, you have changed my comments forever.
not really sure what Monster and Just Saying are talking about…
But this isn’t trash and the writer isn’t bitter. What about an op-ed piece praising a musician and urging her to go harder requires research?
That’s how the Minaret roles, Monster. They always print trash they didn’t really bother to research.
You must so bitter not to do research on her….