It’s a dorm, not an after party. — At 4:35 p.m. on Oct. 25, UT Security was dispatched in reference to alcohol offenses in the Hyatt Regency. Students will be referred to the judicial board.

Can you hear me now? — At 4:00 p.m. on Oct. 26, UT Security was contacted to report the theft of a cell phone in the Vaughn Center.

Psych! — At 8:00 p.m. on Oct. 26, UT Security was notified of an activation of the fire alarm in Austin Hall. Tampa Fire Rescue responded and gave the all clear after a building check was completed.

A key piece of evidence … — At 9:48 p.m. on Oct. 26, UT Security was informed of a missing key in Kennedy Place.

The joke’s on them! The only album I uploaded was Kenny G’s greatest hits! — At 1:03 a.m. on Oct. 27, UT Security was dispatched to the Hyatt Regency to report a missing iPod and money.

Dudes, I read about this prank in The Minaret! Let’s copycat it! — At 2:50 a.m. on Oct. 27, UT Security responded to a call of graffitti on several doors in McKay Hall.

Clearly too drunk to think of a better prank. — At 5:30 a.m. on Oct. 27, UT Security observed sand on the floor near the elevators in Brevard Hall. Cameras showed four individuals. An investigation will be done to identify the individuals.

Not so Smiley now, are ya? — At 12:09 p.m. on Oct. 27, UT Security was contacted to report ongoing problems between roommates in Smiley Hall.

Flame on! — At 12:49 a.m. on Oct 28, UT Security responded to a call of some individuals discharging a fire extinguisher by the Austin Hall elevators.

“Backdraft 2: Straz Hall” — At 11:50 p.m. on Oct. 28, UT Security responded to a call of a discharged fire extinguisher by the elevators in Straz Hall.

A-huh-huh-huh. Nachos rule. — At 10:17 a.m. on Oct. 29, UT Security received a call regarding broken glass from a vending machine.

Maybe it’s in Narnia … — At 7:30 p.m. on Oct. 29, UT Security was contacted in reference to clothing that was missing from a dryer.